Breakups are the worst…
Let’s face it. Somewhere along the line we’ve all had our hearts broken. And that’s a difficult space to be. The sky seems less blue and our favorite things are less exciting. We’d rather be at home alone with our Netflix than out with our friends pretending to have a good time when we are not. Fortunately this post breakup phase doesn’t last forever. But in the beginning it can often be hard to see the future when life will go back to normal. The good news is there are some steps you can take to get out of your funk if you’re willing to put in the effort.
Process through your emotions:
One of the biggest problems I see when people are trying to heal a heartache is that they do not give themselves time to feel what they are actually feeling. Sometimes it’s not fun to feel the pain, but the only way around it, is through it. Otherwise you will end up carrying this weight with you until you take the time to process it.
I like to implement what I call the “3 Day Rule.” Give yourself 3 days to be sad, to cry, to throw pillows at the wall and to eat whatever comfort food you need. Stay in bed if you want and remember that its ok to take alone time. But when the 3 days are up – that’s it! You need to get back to your normal life and routine. There will still be some strong feelings to deal with, but by giving yourself space to work through your emotions when it happens, you will be in a much better place as you begin to heal.
Give your mind something else to focus on. Because at this point you’re most likely beating yourself up and analyzing every detail trying to figure out where it all went wrong. The more you focus on this energy, the more worked up you will feel. And unfortunately not everyone is lucky enough to get closure or realize why things worked out the way they did. Even if you happen to be in a position where you have all the answers, you should remember that it isn’t always enough to make you feel any more settled about it.
Distracting yourself can come in many different forms. Preferably you want to do something that will keep your mind busy. You could do crossword puzzles, read a good book, call a friend, go for a walk, do some yoga or even meditate. If this seems like too much you may want to simply create a mantra and repeat it until you feel more calm and in control of your thoughts. Focus on the positive power of thinking to heal your heart.
Move Your Body:
That’s right! Good old fashioned exercise to the rescue. Moving your body can accomplish a variety of things that will be helpful to you as you are going through your healing process. As your body moves it forces your energy to move. And allowing your energy to flow can be the first step in releasing some of the emotional pain you are experiencing. If you’re resonating more with feelings of anger or frustration, hitting a your exercise routine hard can be a great way to release this in a productive way. Not to mention all the feel good endorphins you will be experiencing! The best benefit of all is that you will look and feel good after putting some quality time into yourself. Because let’s face it, you totally deserve it.
If you want to double down here and exercise outdoors instead of at the gym, you will experience even more benefits. Spending time in nature is a grounding experience. Which is exactly the type of energy you need right now. It balances us out and brings us back to center. It’s incredibly easy to do because you don’t need to do any more than put yourself in an outdoor setting and enjoy the view.