How to Build Trust & Why You Let it Hold You Back


Trust is All About What You Believe

Trust is a tricky thing. We need it to function in our lives. But when does it become too much? And where are the places it can trap us in our own mind?

When you think about trust, you must also consider the role that control plays in it. Many times, when we are being asked to trust someone or something, we are actually being asked to let go of control of the outcome because it is no longer in our hands. We must then trust that the other person will come through. Essentially holding up their end of the bargain. Depending what you are asking of someone, this can be a difficult thing to do.

Learning how to trust people in your family or social circle can take time. But after a while you generally know what to expect from them. But how does this change when you’re being asked to put your trust and faith in something bigger than yourself?

In life we are presented with opportunities or inspiration to create change. You’d think that when we decide to go after something we really want, it would end up being a lot easier than it actually is! But the level of difficulty in getting what we want comes down to a few important factors. One of them being trust. Jumping into the unknown can be scary for a lot of people. Unfortunately, it is this level of bravery that is being asked of us.

Why Trust Holds Us Back

There are a few factors to consider when we look into why it’s so hard for us to trust the Universe to catch us when we take a leap of faith into the unknown.


Having trust that things will turn out the right way for us feels impossible. And many of us will hold ourselves back from taking action unless we can guarantee the outcome. This in itself, directly sets us up for failure. We learn lessons from everything that goes right and wrong in our lives. By holding ourselves back in this way, we are pushing ourselves away from necessary events and adversities that will build our strength and character.

The truth about control is that we have none. We can come into a situation with the best laid plans and intentions, and something still has the ability to go wrong. The only thing we have power over is ourselves and how we choose to react to what’s in front of us. The sooner you stop fighting with your life and creating unnecessary resistance, the sooner things will flow in the proper direction.  

Ask yourself what you really have control over and what you don’t. Then see how much of a risk you feel comfortable taking and go from there. Everyone has different life situations and safety nets so you must make educated choices for yourself on a case-by-case basis.

Over Directing

When we are faced with a situation, problem or opportunity, we decide in our mind how it needs to be handled. But how many different ways in life are there to accomplish the same thing? A hairstylist can use a different pattern or technique than the stylist in the chair next to her, and achieve the same result. So why are we making our success contingent on a specific outcome or set of rules? When you allow things to move more freely, it’s easier for the Universe to shift you towards the correct path. Your way is not the only way.

Look at the areas where you might be practicing this behavior and see where you can be more flexible with your thought patterns. Is there an alternative way to get the same results?


When we dive into a situation or a new venture, we have expectations of how things will play out. In essence, our trust becomes the expectation. It’s an automatic thing that most people do without thinking about it. However, having expectations inevitably leads to disappointment. Especially since life doesn’t always turn out the way we want it to. Or how we think it will. It’s all part of the excitement and frustration of being alive. It’s also a good reason why we should consider that what we want isn’t necessarily what we need. So, when things don’t turn out according to our expectations, it’s not always a bad thing. Even if it feels like it is at the time.

It’s important to learn how to separate the role that trust and expectations play in the process. What can you do to let go and trust the process, while releasing any expectations of how you think it should turn out?

How Can We Foster Trust?

Taking a chance on yourself or life can be scary. All the preparation in the world sometimes isn’t enough for the curveballs that might head your way. That’s why having trust that things will work out for your highest good is important. And why it’s imperative that you learn to trust yourself and learn how to acknowledge your intuition as a guidance system. Here’s some things you can do to get the same confidence and strength in your inner world as you project into your outer one.

Just Jump

Sometimes the only way to know anything for sure is to take a leap of faith and just go for it. This is difficult for many of us, because not everyone is a risk taker. If you’re someone who is more cautious or likes to plan for every contingency before making a move, you’re going to end up letting a lot of good opportunities pass you by. Jumping requires you to believe in yourself and trust the process.

Be Open to Receiving

When we are attached to the way something will arrive, it can prevent what we need from showing up. It doesn’t matter how the $200 you need for groceries finds its way to you. It’s only important that food gets there. It might be donated, gifted, refunded, shared, grown or earned thought alternative ways. Don’t let the limitations of your mind limit your ability to receive, simply because it doesn’t show up the way you dictate it needs to. Open yourself to the possibility of different options.


Life has its ups and downs. That’s why focusing on what we have going for us helps us see the positive in life. It allows us to believe that good can happen. Which may ultimately give us the courage to trust ourselves and try something new. Scientifically speaking, it takes 3 positive thoughts or experiences to offset one negative one. Keeping your mind focused on what’s going right, will allow you to take more of the worthwhile opportunities that come your way.

Let Go

When you jump into a new situation, you must do so without any weight holding you back. When we try too hard to hang onto things that aren’t working for us, it puts resistance on the freefall. In order to move into new situations, we need to give ourselves permission to release anything that may hinder our progress or allow us to become stuck. Don’t hang onto things that are no longer serving you, simply for the sake of holding onto them. Trust that if something is being moved out of your way, it’s because it’s no longer supposed to be there. No matter how much time or history you have invested in it.


Having trust also means learning to practice acceptance. You have to trust that whatever situation you jump into will provide the outcome you need; Whether or not you like what that is. With that being said, if you will be put in a terrible or distressing position, please take that into consideration before making a move. You do not have to accept that as part of the risk. Instead, try making smaller moves and working your way up from there.

In talking to people over the decades, I’ve discovered something really interesting. No matter how bad something went for them, something good appeared as a result of the loss. Now to be clear, that doesn’t make the loss any less painful. And it should be processed accordingly. But it does change how you move through the world around you. And that alone has the power to put you in places that might be more in alignment with who you are than you previously realized.

Avoiding life to keep yourself safe or prevent bad things from happening only ensures that you will “exist” instead of “experience”. Don’t hold yourself back from the possibilities of joy, fulfillment and accomplishment because you’ve already decided you’ll fail.

Nikki Wood (Channeled Message)

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