You’ve got this!
The first step to connecting with ourselves is to get in touch with who we really are. Unfortunately, there are a lot of human beings out there that avoid taking much more than a brief glance. Sometimes people are afraid of what they will find or see if they look too deeply. Its not easy to face your inner self, but I’m going to give you some important tips that will help you do this with confidence.
Looking at yourself honestly is the first and most important step in doing any kind of shadow work. It’s important to understand our motives, behaviors, patterns and preferences in order to make progress.
Here’s what you need to know…
Anything you dislike is fixable if you’re willing to do the work.
Realizing that we behave or think in a way that is undesirable can be an embarrassing revelation. This feeling alone drives people away from doing any kind of self-work. But keep in mind that one quality that needs some work doesn’t make you a bad person. It makes you human. Simply being aware of what you want to change will help get the process going. First, you’ll start to notice when you’re exhibiting the behavior you want to change. And it probably will feel bad and uncomfortable for a bit. But then you’ll notice that you start to catch yourself and change the behavior before acting on it. You just have to remember it’s important to give yourself the time to change. And don’t forget to practice self-compassion during the process.
Not attaining something doesn’t mean you have failed.
When look at ourselves we take stock of everywhere we have been as well as the things we have accomplished. But instead of blaming ourselves for things not working out the way we wanted, it is important that we gain an accurate perspective. Especially with the situations we can’t seem to let go of. Just because something didn’t work out, doesn’t mean you did something wrong. So, lay off the judgment and give yourself a break. Spirit delivers based on where you should be going, not necessarily by the quality of work you put forth. It’s always working behind the scenes to keep you on track. Spend some time looking at the areas of your life that make you feel inadequate. And assess if its an indicator of what type of human being you are, or if it’s just something you feel like you need in order to feel good about yourself. Chances are, you’re enough without it.
Your inner child needs you more than you know.
Many of us brush off the things that happen to us in our childhoods because it seems like so long ago. But the truth is, these moments shaped us and influenced who we turned into as adults. We usually don’t give this much of a second thought. But getting in touch with your younger self can really help connect us with who we are and the changes we wish to make moving forward. Spend some time with your inner child by meditating and meeting up with yourself at different ages, or during times you remember feeling unsafe or unsupported. Having a conversation with another version of you can be helpful in understanding how you felt. And it gives you the much-needed opportunity to provide yourself with what you needed at that time but couldn’t get. Working out your childhood fears, needs and issues can be very grounding. When your child feels more secure, so will you!
Your heart is important to listen to.
For some reason we like to ignore what our heart is telling us. Our emotions and feelings seem like too much, they’re inconvenient, they feel silly or are just plain getting in the way of what we need to do at the moment. But this is the complete wrong approach! Ignoring your pain or uncomfortable feelings just puts you in a place of sacrificing what you truly need. And you’re so vitally important! Connecting with yourself means having to face those strong emotions and take stock of what’s really going on internally.
Our heart is a strong indicator of healing that needs to take place. It lets us know when we have blocks that need to be cleared. And when it’s operating at full power, it gives us the self-assurance to do anything that we want. It might feel uncomfortable to dive into all of the feelings you’re experiencing. But nothing is going to change if you’re not willing to lean in and do the work. So much pain and emotion are carried in our heart center. And much like your car, home or garden – it requires regular maintenance and thoughtful attention.
You are enough just as you are.